Search This Blog

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Eric and The Sleepiness



                I went to bed late last night, not much later than usual but later than I should have gone to bed.  I put in my mouth guard (I may or may not grind my teeth but just in case I have a $275 piece of plastic that clips onto my bottom front two teeth.  It keeps my mouth from closing so that my back teeth never touch. Yay), I turned on my iPod(the new Danger Mouse & Daniele Luppi album featuring Jack White and Norah Jones, it’s actually quite pleasant to sleep to), I put on my breathing mask, turned the internet functions off on my iPhone( push notifications scare the crap out of me while I’m sleeping, and I can’t turn it on silent because it’s my alarm clock and I need to be able to receive calls from my employees should the building burn down or probably something way less dramatic), I turned the light off, laid down, looked at the clock (10:01 pm [I know it’s sad but I have to get up at 5:30am]), and then my brain went off.
                I hadn’t been able to think of anything to write about yesterday and I had tried.  I thought about writing just for the sake of writing, I thought about writing about my iPhone, I thought about writing about my weird OCDs (that might still happen…later), and I just couldn’t come up with anything.  To be fair I was really busy yesterday at work and anytime I had to chill and do paperwork or something like that I was listening to podcasts( I listen to a lot of comedian’s podcasts because they like to talk about writing and how their process is and it fascinates me[specifically the Nerdist podcast]).  I know I’m making excuses but I do work between 60 and 70 hours a week (at 12 hours a day), I spend more of my waking hours at work than I do at home.  But I digress, so… As soon as I closed my eyes I had an idea.
                I know it was about prayer, but that’s all I can remember.  I was laying there and this thought popped into my head and I heard myself saying that I should get up and go type this right now.  Then another part of me said “are you insane? It’s 10:02pm, go to sleep and write it in the morning”.  So as I laid there arguing with myself internally(obviously) I asked if this was God telling me to go write  or was it the part of me that knows that if I didn’t go write this now I’d never remember what it was.  I told myself that all I had to remember was two words, one was “prayer” and the other was “?”.  I have no idea what I was so excited about writing last night.  I’m pretty disappointed in myself right now.
                I guess I’m wondering if it’s possible for God to want me to sacrifice sleep (something that could adversely affect my job performance) to write something that would probably make me happy, or is it more likely that the devil is screwing with me.  Then again, it could just be the way my brain is wired.  I’ve always been more of a night person.  If my job depended on writing, I would change my schedule so that I could write at night, but it doesn’t, so I don’t.
Eric Anderson

1 comment:

  1. I am so excited! YES, God was speaking to you! It's ok though...don't get down on yourself. He knows you are learning. Remember what Mr. Denharder said....God speaks through your mind a lot of times and I suspect you're like me and don't trust your mind...that's ok too. It's a learning process...there is grace for that. Next time listen to that thought! The cool thing about God when it's Him talking is that if you have to sacrifice sleep to do what He says He gives you the ability to function...He knows we are "but dust". Just be you...God will still use you!

    ReplyDelete