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Monday, January 9, 2012

Eric and The Company of Men

            People keep telling me that I need to spend more time with men and that I need positive male influences to teach me how to be better at being a Godly man who is the spiritual leader of his family and all that.  Here’s the thing, I don’t like men very much of all the people that piss me off in the world most of them are men.  And it’s probably because of where I live there aren’t the right kind of men around for me to hang out with but that’s just how I see things in this small horrible town that I live in.  I don’t have anything in common with men, I don’t like cars, Nascar, wrestling, sports, shooting harmless animals (not that I have a problem with that, because God know I’ll eat the hell out of a steak, it’s just not the environment I like to be in).  I don’t like racism (this is Texas so it’s everywhere), I mentioned that I don’t like sports before (shocker) but let’s talk about the biggest sport for a second.  I hate football; it is the stupidest thing that has ever been invented in the history of things.  Except for maybe war and Howard the Duck (don’t act like you don’t remember).
Do you know how dumb it is to intentionally run into another running person who is running towards you? That can’t be good for anything inside of you.  Children should not be allowed to play it, with all of the studies out there now (by now I mean that this is a fairly recent discovery, see the P.P.P.S.) that talk about the long term side effects to getting hit in the head when you’re a child playing football, the parents and school administrators and coaches should all be arrested for child abuse (okay, maybe not arrested, but at least sternly talked to).  I don’t mine full grown adults killing themselves for millions of dollars out on a nationally televised football field (they deserve what they get), but the fact that it is still legal to let our children do these things to themselves and the fact that we encourage it so much is truly horrible.  We lift these young impressionable minds up to be “heroes” and we treat them like they are “soldiers” out on a battlefield just because they can run around on a field and hurt one another while we pretty much ignore the kids who like to read, learn and be artistic in any way at all.  Not only do we ignore these children we let the football players beat them up and pick on them constantly (high school was hard for me).
Now I know that the argument will be that everything is bad for something and that is true.  There are tons and tons of extremely dangerous retarded things that we all do on a regular basis, but this one just doesn’t make any sense.  Breaking bones is one thing but our brains are crazy fragile and this is dumb.  I keep seeing things about how our body is a temple and that the good Christian thing to do is take care of it (I’m obviously the worst about this because I’ve absolutely destroyed my temple, but that doesn’t make giving yourself a concussion okay)  Why can’t they just play soccer?  You don’t even want to hear what I have to say about the funding issues.  So I’ll stay away from that as it’s not the point of this particular rant.
            Now that that’s been said, let’s talk about the things I do like: most nerdy stuff, video games, science (although I’m not that good at it), technology, music, photography, movies, TV, books, comics, comedy, etc… mostly things that most men, at least around here, don’t give a rat’s ass about.  I don’t know how to relate with other men.  Every time I see a guy I don’t really know that well they’ll ask “so where you workin’ now?” as if that’s the most important thing in my life.  I don’t want to talk about my job I want to talk about the new batman or star trek movie.  I want to talk about the newest death cab for cutie album or how the scientist over at CERN might finally find the Higgs-Boson this year (again, something that’s very hard for me to understand but fascinates me none the less).  I want to talk about the walking dead or how the series finale of lost disappointed me more than I let on but it didn’t sour me on the whole series (and after weeks of reviewing it over and over in my head I grew to appreciate it) because it was truly one of the greatest most think inducing television shows that I’ve ever seen in my entire life (nothing ever made my brain try so hard to figure out what the crap was going on like lost did). I want to talk about how portal 2 has changed the way that I look at the world of gaming and how it’s the awesomest and funniest thing that I have ever experienced in my life.   I want to talk about battlestar galactica or doctor who or the elder scrolls, but I think you’re getting the point.  There are too many references to cram into this thing.
            Basically, I don’t get men and men don’t get me and I’m totally okay with that it just makes it hard for me to have any positive role models in my life.

Eric Anderson

P.S. I’m sorry that I hate football (I’m not really sorry that I hate football)

P.P.S. I’m sorry that I lied in the P.S.

P.P.P.S. in case you think that I’m making this stuff up here’s one of a million things talking about it and you can google the rest.


  1. I agree completely except for Portal 2 ;)... And if u wana talk about CERN, I studied Physics at college (doesn't mean I understand it tho :p) also lived right next to it for the last 25 years lol...

  2. Terry,
    First of all, I can't make you like Portal 2 but you should know that the first portal blew my brains right out of my head and I doubted that the second one would have that effect but it managed to finish the job plus it was freaking hilarious. So I guess we can agree to disagree, I can do that, I'm an adult.
    As far as the CERN thing goes, I know very very little about it other than the fact the super colliders are cool and anti matter is scary. But, this whole business about the recent possible discovery is fascinating.

  3. You are an interesting person indeed! There are men out there who like the things you do and they do live in this town. So you tried a few times and it didn't work out. That's no reason to quit trying to find men you can relate to. That is exactly what the enemy of your soul delights in doing...keeping you isolated from others. Making you believe that there isn't anyone out there who understands or has gone through what you are. The truth is that previous statement is a lie. There is not a person who has solely gone through something that no one else has. God wouldn't have you live here and not have a friend for you. Ask Him to send you one. He will! I will be praying that for you as well so WHEN that friend comes along you will KNOW that God hears and answers :)

  4. I for children should be banned, and any parent who allows their child to play the sport, should loose that child. At the next family gathering, I know Terry will happily talk about the games, movies, and other such nerdy stuff =)

  5. Who doesn't like portal? seriously? Just kidding, I know he likes elders scrolls so he's cool with me.